sometimes i feel like people with a whole lot of followers see a good post by someone without a whole lot of followers and go
i’m gonna make you famous
one time i forced my mom to play pokemon for at least half an hour and all she did was catch a butterfree and name it lowfat
Step 1- Buy her pizza.
Step 2- Make her cum.
College is viewed as a necessity, yet priced as a luxury.
so today at work I cleaned this old man’s golf clubs and I thought he was getting his wallet out of his bag but instead he pulls out this giant plastic target bag of yellow plums. he tipped us in yellow plums. he told us not to tell anyone we had these and I looked them up because they were so good and these plums are illegal in the US. I got tipped in illegally imported plums.
what if obama does the ice bucket challenge and nominates queen elizabeth
what if obama actually talks about what’s going on in ferguson
|—||the funniest person you will ever meet (via flamingno)|
"hey daria u wanna go party"
uhhh no i have to stay indoors n mope
"haha daria ur something else"
Unfriendly reminder that in America it’s reasonable to say an unarmed black kid deserved to be shot six times because he might have robbed a convenience store, but a white kid shouldn’t be kicked off the high school football team just because he violently raped a girl.
omg i just remembered
back in fifth grade i had this bus driver, she was the sweetest old lady, she would occasionally give everyone on the bus little treats and stuff
her name was Mrs. Brothers
her first name was Gay
(calls police) hello, some bitch is still trying to talk to me about frozen