Court Dismissed, bring in the dancing lobsters.
When I was little I thought they actually did this in court
"I don’t wear makeup so I don’t have to waste like an hour in front of the mirror every morning hahahaha"
"open books not legs"
"why have tequila shots when you can have tea?"
"As always, late with Starbucks"
"modest is hottest"
"I’m not like those girls”
"period cramps can’t be that bad"
*stares at the lifeless body of the Frankenstein monster*
"Perhaps man is the real monster"
*voice from within the peasant mob*
"Not all men!"
*sees a mans ego getting crushed*
Why just a mans? Thats sexist.
when u try to caffeinate yourself and just end up increasing ur heart rate with no discernible changes in levels of exhaustion
*hears child crying* *takes birth control*
i’m the guy who shoots the bullet through the CDs to make the hole